


Sweets Thief

by Pigeonations



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Angry Kissing, Fluff and Humor, Kind of a Valentine's Day fic?, Lots of chocolate mentioned, M/M, welcome to rarepair hell
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-15
Updated: 2017-02-15
Packaged: 2018-09-24 15:32:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9768251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pigeonations/pseuds/Pigeonations
Summary: Stealing is one thing. Lying about it is a different story.





	

It started with a single cake.

Dwyer had been in the kitchen for most of the day, baking all sorts of pastries for a banquet Corrin had been planning for months. He was reluctant to volunteer himself for the job, but the chance to prove himself a better passitier than his father was too tempting to give up. After finishing his normal cleaning duties, he reported straight to the kitchen. His hands were caked in flour and the scent of chocolate seemed to cling to his skin, but the array of cakes and cookies set out on the counters before him showed the fruits of his labor. A small smile crossed his lips as he put the finishing touches on his last chocolate torte, gingerly placing a few blackberries on top of the dessert. Taking a few steps back to admire it, Dwyer let out a sigh of relief.

“That's the last of them...not bad, if I do say so myself.” He turned around and began cleaning up the stray patches of chocolate frosting and raspberry sauce that were on top of the counter behind him. He came across a bowl of chocolate sauce that was still on the counter, a spoon placed across it. Dwyer picked up the bowl of chocolate with one hand and retrieved the spoon with the other.

“Almost forgot. A bit of chocolate on top for good luck.” He turned back towards his cake and began drizzling sauce onto the counter.

...Wait, counter?

Dwyer’s eyes widened as he quickly dumped the spoon into the bowl. He frantically looked around the kitchen then back down. His torte was gone, plate and all. Only a few stray crumbs remained. He blinked a few times to confirm that he just wasn't having a bad dream.

“...Huh.” Dwyer frowned and slowly set the bowl down. He quietly made his way over to the sink, listening for any possible intruders. He turned the handle and began pumping soap to wash his hands. “Oh well. One cake won't be missed.” He shrugged and scrubbed the flour off of his hands. Dwyer did a double take as he reached for a towel. Before he could even dry his hands, another cake had been stolen.

He blinked once.

A plate of cookies had disappeared.

Twice. A few plates of brownies.

Now he was starting to get angry.

He thought about possible culprits. Not many in the army were stealthy enough to sneak into the kitchen and take plates full of dessert without any sound or trace left behind, but there were a few who would do anything for a taste of good pastries. Regardless, out of all the things he was willing to put up with, a sweets thief was not one of them. There was one person in the entire camp that had the skill and the motive to pull it off.

It didn’t take him long to find Asugi. Ignoring every butlering instinct in his body, Dwyer barged into Asugi’s room. Asugi startled a bit, nearly falling off of his bed and swallowing the lollipop hanging haphazardly from his lips.

“Geez, Naps! Where’s the fire?”

“Give them back.”

“Wha?” Asugi raised an eyebrow, sitting up.

“Give what back?”

“My cake.” Dwyer kicked the door closed behind him and began approaching the thief. “My brownies, my cookies-- you know. Everything I spent this entire day slaving over a hot oven over for this banquet?”

“Uh, buddy? I haven’t been near the kitchen all day.” Asugi stuck his tongue out. “Mm, you smell great though! What is that, milk chocolate?”

“That’s none of your business!”

“It suits you.” Asugi licked his lips and reached for Dwyer’s wrist. “You got bon-bons on you or something?”

“Admit it.” Dwyer jerked his hand away.

“Admit what?”

“You _stole_ my hard earned work!”

“I'm telling you, I didn't do it!” Dwyer glared as he leaned in closer towards him. Asugi looked up at him, arms crossed and brow furrowed. Even under the intensity of Dwyer’s scowl, he didn't dare to show any signs of fear.

“Prove it.”

“Prove what?! I didn’t do anything!”

“Show me your hands.”

“Are you--” Asugi groaned, rolled his eyes and yanked off his gloves. He held his hands towards Dwyer. “See? All clean!”

Dwyer bent down to look Asugi in the eye, his expression unwavering.

“What have you eaten recently?”

“Lemon custard. _Not_ chocolate.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Look, I don’t know what to tell you then!” Asugi threw his hands up in frustration. “Hound me over your stupid cake all you want but for the last time: I. Didn’t. Steal. Any--”

Before he could even blink, a sudden weight made impact with his shoulder. It was enough to make him fall backwards and just barely hit the back of his head on his headboard. He flinched and squeezed his eyes shit, half expecting Dwyer to hit him. He felt something heavy keeping him down and something warm over his mouth. He couldn’t quite assess what had happened fast enough to get a firm grasp of the situation. He hesitantly opened an eye to see Dwyer hovering above him, lips pressed firmly against his own.

Asugi wasn’t sure how to react-- or even if he should react. It wasn’t exactly a bad feeling… Asugi attempted to sit up, but Dwyer kept a firm grip on his shoulder. After a bit of struggling, Asugi simply gave up and let it happen. He had to admit, Dwyer wasn’t exactly a bad kisser. He didn’t expect Dwyer to be so forceful. As quiet and complacent as he seemed, the last thing Asugi expected to see was this side of him. If this was the result of pushing his buttons, then he was tempted push a bit more.

“Asugii!” A brief soft knock on the door broke through the silence, followed by the creaking of the door. Midori poked her head through the door, licking something off of her fingers. “Hey, where do you want me to stash the…” Her words trailed off as she stared at the two.

Dwyer pulled away and Asugi gasped for air, quite literally breathless. Dwyer slowly backed off of him and looked back at Midori, still visibly upset.

“Stash... _what_?”

“U-Um…” Midori smiled nervously, fidgeting. She looked up at Dwyer and quickly cracked under the pressure. “I’m sorry! Your cake looked so good and, and…” She backed away. “Please don’t be mad at me!”

“See? Told you I didn’t do it…!” Asugi smirked, sitting up.

Dwyer approached Midori, gently plucking her forehead. “Next time just ask, okay?”

“You’re...you’re not mad?” “Not anymore.” Dwyer shrugged, moving past Midori and out the door. “Come on, I’ll let you take a few samples.”

“Great!” Midori perked up and waved back at her cousin. “Bye Asugi! See you tonight!” The door closed behind them, leaving Asugi by himself. He leaned back on his bed and began smiling a bit.

The taste of chocolate lingered on his lips.

**Author's Note:**

> Consider this a rewrite of something I wrote last year  
> There's not enough Dwysugi content and I have to be the evil I want to see in the world


End file.
